Friday, July 30, 2010

Value people - 91

Loshon Hora includes saying anything negative about a person , any blemish & any type of shortcoming. Anything that may cause the person physical or financial harm , pain or fear in any form.
Don't sell anyone short. What you say about people reflects what you feel they are worth. You need to always be alert not to hurt others by any of your words.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

More Exceptions -90

The so called news media has been called Dangerous.

It can drastically change a persons day & mood & ruin ones perspective. What is generally presented as news is contrary to the Torahs teachings of reality & how Hashem wants us to live.
We are here to serve Hashem with joy. To uplift others , to connect with Hashem & to strive to improve ourselves.
The news in general is a form of loshon hora by highlighting , dramatizing & presenting rare situations as if they represent the proper norm.
To live a happier , more positive , healthier & peaceful life , we need to avoid focusing on the news in the wrong way.
We need to learn & pay attention to the Good news , that Hashem is providing in abundance.
We need to say with feeling , this too is good. Boruch Hashem
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Word Exceptions -89

There is a Mitzva to speak up and teach such guidelines -

* Don't live in that place because there are negative influences upon people there. C. C. 4:10:41.

* Don't hang out with so & so because he behaves with arrogance or anger or wastes time from Torah study etc , and you have to avoid so that you do not learn from his negative ways.

The explanation for these exceptions is that the primary prohibition of Loshon Hora is when the intention is to demean others & rejoice over their shame , but to protect others from negative influences is a Mitzva.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Stories behind Words - 88

All words have stories behind them but we need to determine which stories to tell. We need to highlight life-giving stories that keep on helping us grow continuously.
Each year we re learn the Parshiyos of the Torah on deeper & higher levels & we need to asses which stories to amplify & replace. We need to develop our creativity & realize how much abundance & infinite potential Hashem blesses us with.
The choices are ours. Which words do we want to use to take us where we want to go ?
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Pain = Gain -87

Yes , it is a Mishna Avos 5:23.

But we need to understand the concept. Pain can be a test to see how committed we are to the Mitzva we are doing.
The Mesilas Yeshorim sums up our purpose in life in 3 steps
To perform Mitzvos
To serve Hashem &
To withstand tests.
The more difficulties one encounters in doing what's right , the more rewards for his accomplishment.
In order to enjoy life more , we need to focus on speaking right. One who seems to have more challenges in speech control , should realize that it is a gold mine of an opportunity. Let him devote himself to mastering the laws of proper speech & strike it rich. You will reap huge rewards by focusing on overcoming your urge to speak negative words.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Time is a Decision - 86

One who says , I don't have time , its like saying , I don't want to.
We control how we use our time. It is a gift of 168 hours a week from Hashem to use per our choice.
You are in charge & your choices are important.
What needs your attention most now ?
The words you use , the NO to wasting time , and the YES to more joyous time for what matters to you , makes the difference.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Words of Healing - 85

We say in our daily prayers -
Please bring up a complete healing to all of our wounds.

Although Hashem is invisible , He is the great physician to Whom nothing is impossible. He is the Creator of all & the Healer who can heal all.
We need to focus our thoughts & words of prayer to Him. We can merit help from Hashem by shifting our thoughts to focus on that He is the loyal doctor who is most compassionate. We have the power to merit being healed by Hashem & also to pray for others to be healed , by changing our thoughts to focus sincerely on our prayers.

Our words of prayer can make our world.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Words of Connection -84

A method for dealing with loneliness is to realize that it is an inner reminder for a person to reach out & connect more with others. Phone friends more , make plans to meet & take walks together etc.
Reach out to your loved ones , don't ignore them. There are times to reach out & many Mitzvos that we can do better with others.
The Talmud has an amazing statement which highlights the great significance of learning to interact more with others -
Either one has friends or death ...
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Words of Lonliness -83

We are tempted to put things off for later. To conquer our laziness , our Sages train us to always say -
If not now , When ?
But there is another factor as well. We are reluctant to do things by ourselves due to loneliness. Thus , finding a partner to work with helps things move faster , smoother & with more joy.
We thrive on guidance , reassurance & encouragement. Gaining the support of others is very helpful to help us achieve our goals.
Even a few words of Chizuk can do wonders to help people achieve great goals.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Words of Resentment - 82

Words need the right timing , Mishley 15:23.

The Mishna Avos 4:18 , cautions - Do not appease someone while he is angry.
Resentment may accumulate at times , people become cold & hostile to each other. We realize it is time to make peace , but how do we start ?
While the anger is seething , it will not work. Don't try to make up before letting go of the anger.
Start talking things over. Realize you both have some flaws , both have some admirable qualities , express some appreciation & gratitude & both sides apologize.

Love & pursue peace , love people ...
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Words of Thanks - 81

To protect ourselves from saying negative words , it pays to strive to be extreme in saying such positive words as - Thank you.
Gratitude is a fundamental obligation of being a person., to appreciate all of the many favors & gifts we enjoy from others regularly.
There are many people who have been very helpful in many ways to teach others how to get ahead & succeed in life.
We are actually taught on this weeks Parsha 10:12 , that the Torah is hinting to the Mitzva to say at least 100 thank you Brochos daily.
We also need to learn another Mitzva phrase which are sweet words that people enjoy & can make ones day - you re Welcome.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Good to All - w. 80

This too is for the Good.

One of the insights in this Talmudic saying is that Hashem has everyones benefit in mind.
At times we need to decline & say we are unable at the present to do something for someone. But then we may think we are letting the person down. The truth however is that if this opportunity was not for you Hashem has other & maybe better ways of helping them.
You need to follow the Torah guidelines of when & how to help others & to know that Hashem is still running the whole world , as always , & He knows who needs what , when.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Word Gifts - 79

We can give each other positive , fine , reputations to live up to.
Who are you when you are at your best ?

What was your best hour yesterday ?

There are times when you are more productive , vigorous & enthusiastic. ! We can extend those times by focusing on then more & making them the vision of how we see ourselves.

You are capable , competent , a good person. Hashem has invested a lot in you to this point & He is eager to do much more for you as soon as you choose to run with it.
The way you see others & yourself will make a great difference in what will develop.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Words of Apology - 78

What may be the very greatest of the 7 steps of the truly wise is the last one - to admit to the truth.
It heals , leads to change , saying I'm sorry shows that you really care for the person & you are going to set things straight.
The amazing cleansing power , asking for forgiveness , accepting upon oneself a sincere commitment to improve oneself , one step at a time. It begins with saying I'm sorry & I was wrong.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

The greatest Word Skill - 77

We have a unique Mishna which teaches us the great goal of becoming a disciple of Aharon !
We then describe 4 of his attributes that we need to achieve. The question has been raised , which of the 4 qualities may be considered the greatest of them all ?

A suggestion is the third - loving people & that it was his ultimate secret. He would listen to each person & make them feel as if he were their very best friend & that they were the only person in the room at the time.
To develop this skill will change our lives & enable us to follow in the footsteps of Aharon Hacohen.
To devote your full attention to someone , focus on them completely is a super skill that we need to develop.
Consider when you have a meeting with your big boss , you know how to do this well , because you are convinced it matters.
Really great people do this all the time , with every person.

Don't forget & don't get distracted , it will make a great difference in your life.

The fence for Wisdom is -
Silence - it is a way to show others that you are listening to them , which can make them feel like a million dollars.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Listening to Words - 76

To succeed in learning from all people , we need to learn how to listen well. It is not only a passive activity ,rather an active process.
There are 4 parts to the process as we see them divided in the Mishna Avos 5:10 , as the first 4 principles which define a Wise person -

First step - Listen with Respect

Think who is speaking & why are they significant ? We need to show that we respect the speaker & demonstrate that we are eager to listen to them. Act as if the speaker is the only person around.

Second Step - Don't interrupt

The way you face the person , from your eyes to your body language , can communicate how important they are & how you desire to hear what they want to say.
Step 3 - Don't rush to Respond
Think before you speak to respond. All of these steps require discipline. The more you think it over & consider the meaning & value of the message you just heard , you demonstrate how you value the speaker.
Step 4 - Listen Well & prepare your response
Think , do I have all the necessary information. ?
What will be the consequences of my response ?
Will my response hurt anyone ?
Even if my response is the truth , is it worth it to say it now ?

Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.

Word Focus - 75

When your target is as large as an elephant , you can be sure to connect.
It takes determination , motivation , prayer & effort & Hashem will lead you to achieve. Hashem helps us with abundant success when we focus properly.
Hashem encourages us - Open your mouth wide & I will fill it up.
This is part of the system of , He used to say , which is a method of developing the right focus by means of ongoing review.
But words are not all , the main point is the resulting action (Avos ).
Always think - how can I apply this lesson today. ?
We need to teach ourselves & others how to live & master our challenges.
Now may be a good time for a gem of Torah study.